Naomi and Wendy, who have been friends for almost two decades, met in primary school when they were both four years old. Their friendship blossomed as they shared common interests and a great sense of humour. Over the years, they have gone through various life stages together, including childhood, adolescence, and now, adulthood.

They had never had a fight or gone a week without talking to each other until they graduated from university and their lives began to change.

After college, Naomi moved to a different city to work at a Financial Services firm, while Wendy continued living in their little town. Naomi was the youngest person in the firm and she always felt she had to stay late and work harder to prove that she deserved the job. By the time she got home at night, she was too tired to do anything but microwave her supper, listen to music, and go to bed. Meanwhile, Wendy felt isolated without Naomi, and she realized that she had very few other close friends.

As time passed, their communication became more and more strained. Wendy had always been the one to arrange times to talk, but she resented the fact that Naomi never texted her first and often cancelled their calls. Wendy stopped trying to reschedule after Naomi cancelled calls, assuming that her friend would follow up if their relationship was really important to her.

Naomi was lonely and exhausted, but she didn’t want to ask the friend who’d stopped reaching out to her for help. She started making passive aggressive comments about how lucky Wendy was to have stayed in their hometown, and how she didn’t need her old friends anymore. Wendy had never been good at confrontation, and she made excuses not to meet when Naomi came back to town the next weekend.

They began to grow apart emotionally, physically, and mentally.

Eventually, Naomi realized that her friendship with Wendy was too valuable to lose. She texted Wendy to schedule a video call, telling her that she was afraid of losing their friendship and wanted to have an honest conversation about it.

Discussion questions:

• If you were Naomi, how would you prepare for the video call? If you were Wendy?
• How would you help a person like Wendy, who dislikes confrontation, to share her concerns freely? Have you had personal experience of having to confront issues in a friendship in order to strengthen it?
• What boundaries and expectations need to be set and shared for friendships to remain healthy and fulfilling over time?
• How do you think the length of a friendship impacts its significance and the effort we put into maintaining it?