Sandra, Spain: "I’d lived 22 years of my life convinced that God didn’t exist"

Sandra shares how, on her first visit to an Opus Dei centre, she was surprised to discover that what her friend had described to her as a cultural gathering was actually a meeting in a flat with a chapel. She was taken aback to see people genuflecting through a door to her right: “Now I know what a genuflection is, but at that moment, I wasn’t sure what they were doing. They were sort of kneeling…” When she saw the oratory, she was flabbergasted and thought, “I need to leave as soon as possible.”

Although she initially thought the way of life of Opus Dei members was incomprehensible, something changed when she met a believer who was living with cancer, and when someone recommended that she read Mere Christianity by C.S. Lewis. The reading made her question whether God might actually exist. This was a turning point in her life, because she had “lived 22 years convinced that God did not exist.”

When I left the confessional, I sat in front of the Tabernacle and it felt like God was my Father. So that was very significant for me, because I really didn’t have a father figure due to my family circumstances.

The real transformation began when she accepted her friend’s advice and went to confession. “When I left the confessional, I sat in front of the Tabernacle and it felt like God was my Father. So that was very significant for me, because I really didn’t have a father figure due to my family circumstances.” This moment was crucial for Sandra: “The God I always imagined was this very distant God, but suddenly, He was my Father! And He loved me.” This led her to reflect on her life, her relationships, and to consider her vocation. She felt that she wanted to be like the people who lived this faith, even though she did not fully understand what it meant to be part of Opus Dei. “I didn’t know what a numerary or an associate was, but what I had discovered made me very happy.”

After this experience, Sandra began going to Mass daily, praying, and living a life of piety that she felt was a necessity. Her decision to become an associate of Opus Dei came naturally, due to her need to be close to her family. “I am still the same person, but my life has changed radically.” Although her life took on new habits, such as “investing the time I used to spend watching TV on things with more meaning,” the most important thing for her is the inner peace she has found. “I am sure that God is with me all day.”

Sandra concludes: “Being an associate is my happiness, it is the meaning of my life.”