Laura, Spain: "I was a numerary for 25 years. I don't consider those years to have been wasted"

For a long time, Laura felt like she hadn’t quite found her place, even though she had never questioned her vocation: “I had never questioned it, because it was deeply mine, and precisely because I had made the decision freely, I never considered solving the problem by changing that.”

However, there came a point when being alone with herself became difficult: “it wasn't normal to be 40 years old, with a loving family, a job I loved… and still feel this way. Why did I feel that way?” It was then, during prayer, that she thought: “Maybe I can keep loving God just as much, but without carrying this burden.”

The overall experience was positive, without a doubt; I don't consider those years to have been wasted at all.

One of Laura’s biggest fears was how her family would react. Her parents are supernumeraries, and her brother is a numerary, so she worried that her decision might cause a “scandal.” However, she eventually came to the conclusion that “if they love me, they’ll love me just the same.” When she shared her decision, she was met with support and understanding: “It was quite easy. Once I saw that, I started talking about it, and I never felt pressured in any way.” Throughout this process, she experienced a deep sense of peace, realizing that God wasn’t asking her for something she had imposed on herself: “It was as if God were saying to me, ‘I’m not the one asking you to carry this burden: you put it on yourself.’”

For Laura, freedom and obedience are not incompatible. She explains that spiritual accompaniment doesn’t take away freedom but rather provides a fresh perspective: “At the first moment of doubt, you don’t just pack up and leave.” However, in her case, the decision was made with maturity and peace: “And that peace gave me a lot of confidence to say: This is from God."

Once she had made her decision, she faced the challenge of sharing it with those around her: “Now I have to talk to 25 people about it… But I didn’t really care what they said, because the only thing that mattered to me was what God thought.” Today, she maintains a close relationship with members of Opus Dei and holds no resentment: “If Opus Dei has done anything in my life, it’s been to help me, without a doubt." She is living her faith fully and in peace.